The king is dead

On this very morbid day, many celebrity bodies dropped, notably that of the King of Pop and Perversion who now lies dead in his perfidy. Like his predecessor in that office, Elvis, his passing created a great hullabaloo. In due time we will likely see conspiracy theorists, claims that "he's alive" and cheap Las Vegas impersonations, no doubt. 

Almost makes me feel sorry for poor Farrah Fawcett, whose legitimate suffering and bravery in the face of terminal cancer (which I know something about, my dear departed grandparents succumbing to the same disease) has been regrettably overshadowed by this bloated, gleaming, shiny celebrity death by the dark hands of drugs, gluttony, and perversion.

It is always sad to see real talent squandered for the glory of the present. With MJ's debts to the tune of hundreds of millions, it remains to be seen whether there is even one red cent left for his children to inherit, the entire fortune frittered on luxury and trysts with little boys.

I am guessing his cause of death was either cardiac arrest caused by excessive drug ingestion, or his face finally fell off. The coroner's inquest shall enlighten us presently.

--

Another Rethuglikan has fallen as Mark Sanford, SC governor, has regrettably dashed my slight hopes for him and turned out to be a turncoat perverted adulterer like all the other occupants of the executive suite. Like his predecessor in fornication, our 42nd Dictator, he has disgraced his office and his family, all to satisfy some evident mid-life emotional obsession with some Argentinian dickheadess.

While the man appears to possess a conscience, the fact makes it worse, as he was totally aware and understanding of what he was doing, and chose to proceed anyway.

Another resignation should be forthcoming, as the moral law demands. If a man should lie to his family, he shall lie to those in his trust.

Random notes

Here are some things which deluded people purchase that make no sense to working folks who attempt to live modestly and set an example for their children:

$400 pair of jeans from Hollister: as if the $20 pair from Target (they're 'trendy', too, if I remember right) wasn't suitable enough?

Luxury car: When all one needs in a vehicle is basic transportation!

Liquor: I have no idea what people see in drink

Brooks Brothers suit: Unless you are a Wall Street dickhead, has no practical use

$3,000 60" plasma television: Isn't a 17" screen sufficient? It's always been more than enough for most folks!

Electric car: Requires the same amount of energy to power as a petrol-fueled vehicle, but can only be replenished when near a certain type of electrical outlet. Not too many of those out there on the highway...Guess this is only good if you consider carbon dioxide to be a "dangerous pollutant" like a certain future Leader believes...

---

More cool soap themes have been discovered!

I have largely neglected NBC daytime soaps in the past due to the belief that NBC never really produced anything of quality in daytime. (Certainly this is true to-day.) However, times are changing, and so can opinions. 

The long running, since departed soap Another World, for instance, had an interesting opening sequence and entrance music.

But lo! one better! Another World's spinoff soap Somerset (b. 1970-d. 1976) had its own set of musical wonders to behold. (When you choose the link, select "Themes" from the menu on the left.)

Interestingly, the Master himself, Henry Slesar, was headwriter for Somerset for a number of years. Not surprising, as P&G produced all these programs. 

In that matter, Somerset as a place was actually mentioned on Edge of Night in 1969 or so. So what can we infer from that??

Somerset and Edge share a universe; thereby Another World falls within the Edge universe, thereby so does As the World Turns due to crossover storylines, and then follows all the other P&G soaps that have crossed over therein over the years.

Conclusion: The soap world is smaller than we thought!

Saturday pleasantry

Since I have nothing else to say in these spaces for now, instead here are some delicious images of 1950s pin-up model Betty Brosmer:








I wish women were built like this to-day. Wow.

Sadly, with the homogenization of everything in sight to-day as dictated by our corporate overlords (who just delight in removing anything "unstandardized" from our sight), we must contend with the unremarkable figures of "celebrities" who are declared to be paragons of attractiveness.

But there's always the past, and our memories that linger. So enjoy these samplings while they last.

Movie Review: Quantum of Solace

Quantum of Solace
Released 14 November 2008 (US)
Running time 109 minutes
Starring Daniel Craig as 007 James Bond
Directed by Marc Forster

Not my type of genre here. I hate films with lots of explosions, as a general rule. But absolutely no one compares Bond series films to works of cinematic high art; they compare them to other Bond series films. Therefore I will do likewise and base my assessment of this film contra its predecessors.

As with all Bond films, you get the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The good: Liked Daniel Craig as Bond. The word for his performance is "intense." Wish he could have been afforded more dialogue, but what he had worked. Craig as Bond is more animal, less cerebral. Maybe too much of an action hero. But that's not the actor's fault.

Cinematography was actually quite good, for a Bond film. The director's touches are quite evident in the short but obvious "atmosphere scenes" he uses to set up a sequence. Appears to me like something out of reality television, but at a cinematic level it works better.

Appreciated the fact that there was relatively little sexual content in the film, and that the leading "Bond girl" didn't end up in bed with 007. Perhaps a new age has dawned for Bond, after all.

The relationship between 007 and M was perhaps most developed in this film, of all the Bond films. In fact, it is central to the plot of QoS. Made sense to me, but don't know how Joe Blow from Marrero will like this turn of events.

The realism of this film was well above average for Bond. Of course, I am speaking of the same franchise that gave us Moonraker and Diamonds Are Forever, so that's not saying much. But truthfully speaking, this may have been the most realistic Bond (as realistic as possible, at least) yet. No impossible gadgets observed, no insane evil villains with their crazy evil lairs and their over the top plans for world domination. The villain in this story, if you can call him that, represents the banality of modern evil. And to boot, his interests and the interests of the world's governments (particularly that of a certain superpower) align. Fancy that, a Bond that dares, for once, to call governments villianous! (See what I mean about realism?)

Also, I very much liked the next to last scene. Very, very much liked the touch of the young woman who was the next "Vesper in waiting." One of the most poignant scenes in Bond history.

The bad: Too many explosions and unrealistic acrobatics and pyrotechnics. A standard Bond complaint. Are these still spy films or has Bond become an action franchise? You do the math.

Didn't like the Strawberry Fields character. Don't know why, other than she reminded me too much of Britt Ekland's character in The Man with the Golden Gun. Mary Goodnight, anyone?

Throwing Mathis' body in a dumpster and leaving it there. Yes, it was poignant in a way (at least for me, having been down and out and all that), but how disrespectful can you be? And then Bond takes his money. Nice.

No Q or Moneypenny. Frankly I don't care one way or another (Bond films have improved, I believe, by sacrificing some of their old school 'traditions') but I thought I'd throw it in there for the Bond purists out there.

Had no problem, personally, with this being a rather direct sequel to Casino Royale, having seen that film on its release in 2006. Regrettably, though, you cannot even begin to understand QoS without having viewed its predecessor.

The ugly: Damn jigsaw editing! I darn nearly had an epileptic seizure while trying to follow the chase scenes. You couldn't tell who was doing what, or what was happening. Just another lame stunt from the "razzle dazzle" school of directing.

Lost the train of the plot one too many times. At times only had the faintest idea what everything on screen was all about. Bond films are not known for their strength of plot exhibition.

Final comment: I like the new direction the Bond franchise is taking. I really, really like it. But it is not what Bond is about, at least to Joe Blow from Marrero and other casual Bond fans. Bond is about glamour, style, and artifice to a substantial degree, and all these things have to possess an amount of originality.

Sad to say, but Bond offers little original anymore. In its glory days, Bond was the trend and drove the trends. Now Bond follows the trends. Can't say this is any good for the franchise.

Movie Review: W

W
Released 17 October 2008
Running time around 2 hours
Starring Josh Brolin as George W. Bush
Directed by Oliver Stone

Finally! The long anticipated docu-drama about Amerika's real first Black President!

I have to say, I was expecting this film to be more of a comedy than it was. Granted there were some funny and even some pretty hilarious moments. I don't blame the filmmakers though. It's just that every time I think of Dumbya I start laughing out loud. Bush is the biggest clown since Jerry Lewis.

No real spoilers here plotwise, since everything in the film is public knowledge - Bush's life, his carousing and dessicate days of youth, his alcoholism, becoming "born again", entry into politics, rise to power, presidency, etc. etc.

This is not a documentary, however - more like a character study, as is appropriate for a film that doesn't pretend to be a documentary. My biggest disappointment was not seeing anything related to Hurricane Katrina. That would have been quite cherce.

The film's story focused on two things in particular. One was the secret high-level planning that led up to the Iraq War. Since this is an Oliver Stone film I can't deny that there is a distinct ideological bent to how this is presented, and certainly nothing can be said about how things really went down in the halls of power. But you will not be disappointed, I assure you. The greatest delight is Richard Dreyfuss' Strangelovian portrayal of Dick Cheney, and Jeffery Wright's portrayal of Colin Powell as virtually the only voice of reason within the Administration. (I wonder if that was really the case. I did get to see Gen. Powell in life a couple years ago at a convention, and he seemed reasonable enough - of course, appearances can be deceiving.)

The second aspect, and perhaps the thematic heart of the film, was Junior's relationship with his father. **SPOILERS AHEAD** Now I believe that Stone's central thesis about Bush is that his major purpose in life is to earn his father's respect, in light of his wayward youth and the estimate in his family's mind that brother Jeb would be the Bush son who would go forth to better and brighter things. It has been stated by some critics that W treats its subject somewhat sympathetically. If there is anything that reinforces this perception, it is how Stone demonstrates that perhaps Bush's real need is to make "Poppy" proud of him. This extends to "finishing" the job in Iraq that Bush the elder left "undone".

So are we all pawns of Shrub's inferiority complex? Who knows? But it wouldn't be the first time in history that the common folk suffered and died because of domestic troubles among those who wear the purple.

Of course, this doesn't stop Stone from showing Bush as the simpleton which he is. In all it is a balanced portrayal, though. Dumbs is clearly portrayed as someone who wants to do "good" in the simple-minded American exceptionalist sense of the word, but whose capacities and abilities are too limited to comprehend the complexities entailed therein, and thus becomes dominated by the likes of Rove and Darth Cheney.

Kudos to Josh Brolin and especially James Cromwell for their realistic and honest portrayals of the 43rd and 41st Leaders, respectively.

Presenting Isaac Hayes

Just heard the sad news that the illustrious Isaac Hayes is dead at 65.

NOOOOO!

With that grieving past, let us pay respects to a man who was a legendary talent, a pioneer of soul music, a fashion icon (really!), and an artistic innovator.

The youth may only know him for his work as Chef on South Park, but his discography is his true legacy.

May he rest in peace.

Music collection

Of late the blog has reeked of morbid depression. Time for a change!! And what better time to start than right now!

I would like to list songs which really get my spirits up (well, to the extent that they can be brought "up"). I am limiting my sample to what is in my music collection at this time, since I prefer not to rack my brains for this exercise:

TPiR Theme: The classic! (Not the Latin flavored, butchered post-Barker remix.) Actually all the incidental music, cues, etc., from the show's 'classic era' would fall under this category.

Let's Stay Together - "The Reverend" Al Green: The full version, not the radio edit. The whole song must be heard to be appreciated. Do I ever hate radio edits.

Bridge Over Troubled Water - Aretha Franklin: Not the more famous Simon and Garfunkel version (which is just insipid) but the delectable cover by the First Lady of Soul. Man, does this song sound good when hustling through Eden Park in a lowrider.

Love's Theme - Barry White and the Love Unlimited Orchestra: This instrumental tune always reminds me of some high-glamour 1980s primetime soap opera for some reason. Best heard with powerful headphones (the type that cover the entire ear, not those silly rejects that are inserted into the ear canal) - it makes for a near religious experience.

Chains and Things - BB King: Blues just rule, this is one of the best.

More than a Woman - Bee Gees: Insert insipid disco/Saturday Night Fever joke here. In my world, most associated with 1970s-80s era trips to New Orleans East and the late Plaza at Lake Forest Mall.

Anything by Bernard Hermann: Hermann was the one true genius of cinematic music. I recommend a good complilation album. Best work includes the scores for The Ghost and Mrs. Muir, North by Northwest, Vertigo, Marnie, and of course his greatest work, music for Taxi Driver.

Woman's Gotta Have It & Across 110th Street - Bobby Womack: Bobby Womack is the Man!!

Traces of Love - Classics Four: This song always damn nearly makes me cry, it is that heartfelt.

Give Me Your Love - Curtis Mayfield: This song is too funky, it always reminds me of the nightlife of a distant, more aggreable era.

After the Love Has Gone - Earth, Wind, and Fire: Too many of these songs remind me of home. This one is no exception.

Breezin' - George Benson: Best appreciated when you are on a roadtrip in some distant locale, cruising down a back road somewhere.

I'll Always Love My Momma - The Intruders: This song has been a favorite of late after having been discovered recently. It stands to remain long in the rotation.

Your Love is So Doggone Good - Issac Hayes: Actually, anything by the illustrious Mr. Hayes could go here, but I had to pick my favorite. So there.

Between the Sheets - The Isley Brothers: It's 1983 and you're cruising the 'hood (specifically, Felicity Street, Central City) in a 1970 Cutlass, and the radio begins to play this song for the first time. This is the memory which comes back to me whenever I hear this song played.

Misty - Johnny Mathis: This song gets me, well, misty.

Mercy Mercy Me - Marvin Gaye: Perhaps the best song from what is definitely his best album.

The entirety of Dark Side of the Moon - Pink Floyd: A popular choice with which I concur.

My City Was Gone - The Pretenders: Of course.

Could It Be I'm Falling In Love - The Spinners: A gem of Philly soul. I never get tired of hearing this song.

My Cherie Amour - Stevie Wonder: Classic Stevie Wonder, perhaps his most emotionally honest song.

Virtually anything by the Stylistics: The Stylistics may not be very well known today, but in their day they were the greatest of all the Philly soul groups. Their music has stood the test of time.

Close the Door - Teddy Pendergrass: Yeah! Yeah! TP was the king of smooth love jams in the era. Beginning his career as lead singer of Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes (another fine group which had a few hits), he went solo in the early 70s.

I'm sure there are others but then this poast is growing long, so I'll stop here for now.

Movie Review: The Deer Hunter

Happened to rent this film over the weekend and will share my thoughts below.

The Deer Hunter
Released 1978
Running time just over 3 hours
Starring Robert De Niro, Christopher Walken, Meryl Streep
Directed by Michael Cimino

As a work of visual art it ranks up there with the best films. I have always had a love affair of sorts with grim industrial visages and this film does not disappoint. Overall it presents a depressing but hyperrealistic affair. Just the way I like it.

Running time was no problem, but the first act of the film seemed to drag on and on. The wedding party scene in particular took forever. Cimino could definitely have tightened up the scene a bit. For at least one hour you didn't really know where the director was taking you. This problem would come to haunt Cimino much more tragically in Heaven's Gate.

But I understand that the director was attempting to give the viewer a true feel for the lives of the main characters and setting up the scene for the juxtaposition between their relatively carefree lives before Vietnam, and the damage done to their psyches afterward. At least here the setup made sense, and had a payoff in the long run.

Once the second act commenced the film really got lively, and interesting. Here comes the brute, raw scenes of war, then the falling out that these experiences have on the three main characters. Indeed, this film may be the most compelling tale of the impact of war (not just Vietnam, any war) on a small town and individuals in general that I have seen. Touching, and even tragic.

I understand that this anti-war bias got the film in trouble with veterans organizations. Nothing like Old Glory to worship, eh?

And was it this film that popularized Russian roulette? I would have to believe so, since it seems to be the damn thematic centerpiece of the film.

The actors gave fine performances, especially De Niro who is gradually becoming my favorite actor from this period. And was Meryl Streep ever that young? Hard to imagine now. If there was ever a biopic of Hillary Clinton's life, Meryl Streep would be first choice for casting the lead.

Overall, not the greatest film of all time, but worth watching, and a great approach to the horrors of war from the human perspective. I can see even here, however, elements of what got Cimino in trouble with Heaven's Gate - overemphasis on ambient noise, inability to understand dialogue, drawing out scenes for far longer than humanly possible to endure, including completely pointless scenes that should have been cut.

The end made no sense either. Why the hell would they sing "God Bless America"? It was fucking childish, and made no sense in the context of everything having previously transpired.

I love the 70s (not really)

There is a new and, for a change, semi-interesting program airing in television land nowadays. It airs on CBS at the golden 21:00 hour (9 pm for you uglo-Amerikans) on Thursdays.

(Check your local listings for the name of the program. I am not a television network message board or rolling advertisement.)

I watched the premiere last week, intrigued mightily by its portrayal of that somewhat forgotten and much maligned era in which the story is set, the 1970s. Does it bring back some memories. Yeah, I know it's just a stupid TV program, and a blatant ploy for summer ratings at that (open marriage, anyone?).

Yet like I have mentioned before, I am a sucker for all things 70s. Don't get me wrong, folks. The 1970s sucked. War, inflation, terrorism, public corruption, bad TV and films....whew, glad we don't have to worry about those things today (end sarcasm). But don't you too get the impression that the era was somewhat more innocent? (That is, if you weren't part of the highball culture of sexual and moral perversion which defined the "enlightened" dickheadery of that period.)

For a not so intelligent person such as myself, it was certainly easier to live during that time. You didn't have to press twenty buttons to activate your stereo, you were free of the constant menace that is the mobile phone, and petrol sold for 99 cents a gallon.

The good with the bad, though. The 70s was the period in which most of our current social problems originated. Class warfare, welfare babies, white flight, neoconnism (FYI, most neocons got their start in the Nixon administration), etc. - all got their start, or were aggravated intensely, by the events of that decade. If any of these trends had been nipped in the bud, existence would be much more tolerable today. Instead now we have Emperor George II and his passel of loyal heel clicking Praetorian Guardsmen with an iron grip on the State, working mightily to pervert this land into a fascist dictatorship. To a great extent, they have already succeeded.

So nostalgia has its place....but don't get too lost in the past, else you might not see the hammer back in the present rushing forward to crush your skull.

***
Back to the future...If you are looking for the cost of petrol to decrease to its 'normal price', or pre-2003 level, or whatever, dream on. Understand that once the sellers of petrol see that the Amerikan consumer is willing, in its sheeplike monotony, to shell out over $4 for a gallon of petrol, then what is the incentive for the price to decrease substantially? They can command a high price for all eternity in this situation.

Sure, there will likely be some momentary downward fluctuations of petrol prices, within a narrow range of 30 to 40 cents or so. The price of oil is certainly overvalued, and its current expense is not due to peak oil or some mysterious force, but because the Middle East is currently embroiled in a little unfortunate violence, which serves to reduce output and devalue the increasingly worthless coin of the Imperial realm. But as long as this course of events continues, expect to pay more and more for less and less.

Fascism, after all, is its own reward for the power elite.

Comments on Crystal Skull

Having been compelled to see the latest Indiana Jones film, I have returned in one piece and will provide my comments below.  (There are numerous spoilers also, so look out.)

The film was precisely what I expected - a half pastiche, half homage to the previous films (relying too much on those past films, I'm afraid), half setup for the inevitable sequel.  (Dat's three halves but oh well.)  I wasn't expecting a cinematic masterpiece, of course, and I wasn't disappointed in that regard.  Too much emphasis on comedy when there should have been action and seriousness.  The CGI effects were terribly obvious from a viewer standpoint.  

Harrison Ford looked tired and delivered many of his lines like he didn't know why he was there. I honestly couldn't believe that he could wage a fistfight of that nature in the real world.  Spielberg/Lucas ceded good chunks of the film to Shia LeBoeuf's Marlon Brando doppelganger character, obviously crying out that the show will go on with him wearing the fedora and whip in the future.  Of course this becomes screamingly obvious when it is revealed that he is Indiana's long lost SON!!!  Well isn't that convenient?  Son of Indiana Jones, I dare say?

Cate Blanchett's Russian character was ridiculous and definitely not threatening.  Need I say more?  The Nazis made much cooler villains.

And when did these films become family domestic dramas, or 1950s period pieces?  I thought I was watching a goddamned soap opera at a number of points.  While it was cool to see Marion Ravenwood return (she got old, didn't she?), I did not expect the film to degenerate into dysfunctional long lost family histrionics.  Well, Indiana and Marion (finally) get married at the end and that was kind of cool, so maybe it was worth it.  I did expect the film to make much use of its 1950s setting, and boy did they milk it for all it was worth.  

And nobody can survive falling down three huge waterfalls.  No way.

And finally, the major surprise - aliens as the plot drivers.  (To quote the legend himself, Neil Young: "Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceships flying in the yellow haze of the sun...")  I know that the original idea was something like Indiana Jones and the Saucer Men from Mars.  A complete change of nature for these films.  I don't think they ventured too far from that idea, now did they?  Guess not everything can stay the same, eh?

This was the main item which dropped this film from something theatre-worthy to Sci-Fi Channel film of the week material.  Sickening turn of events for Mr. Spielberg and company.

In short, I was expecting candy corn and dat's exactly what I got.  Now if I had watched this film on my cruddy laptop and Brazil in the theater, that would have been much more enjoyable.  But dat'z the world we live in today.

Bippin' down to Brazil

Managed to finally acquire a long desired copy of the legendary sci-fi epic Brazil this weekend. Watched it on my laptop computer (don't ask). Despite the digital lag (stupid technology) was able to view it from beginning to end. What do I now have to say about this?

As the rappers say: Dat was the truest shit I ever saw.

Working for a GOVERNMENT BUREAUCRACY myself in a GOVERNMENT JOB, I can say with much aplomb that Brazil is a deadly (pun intended) accurate reflection of a totalitarian bureaucracy at work. I have even had to personally deal with ridiculous inanity regarding a check - not exactly the situation as in the film, but seemingly close to it. In many ways, I am Sam Lowry.

If you haven't seen this film then by all means make time for it. You will be enlightened. I am guessing no one at the White House would be happy about this. All the more reason to do this, kemosabe.

Brazil has catapulted itself into my personal top ten. I have searched forever for this film and now having seen it, it did not disappoint. I will have to watch it several times to truly catch all the references therein.

See Spielberg, if you weren't such a dumbass you would be making films like this.

Against my better judgment I will go and see Crystal Skull this weekend and compare and contrast. This will, of course, be expounded upon in a post in the very near future.

Quality film

I have completed writing my story; 101 pages in all. It sucks toward the end but I got it all out.

With that settled, I again want to talk about film. I know, in this age of imperial rampages, a Negro communist with a good chance of becoming our next president, and millions dead in Mesopotamia, this subject seems frivolous, yet films do say something about our culture and society, aspects that the talking heads like to gloss over.

Why do films today seem so shallow and callous? Like I said, films reflect our society's mores and values. A casual attitude toward violence, sex, and morality is prevalent today and certainly represented in our modern film output. I don't enjoy modern films except perhaps for the thrill value they provide. But you know, I like my films to possess a deeper degree of intelligence than the average Hollywood flick today.

Back in the late 1960s and 70s, but starting as early as the late 1950s, films broke the restrained, convention heavy pattern that was the house style of American cinema from the dawn of sound films onward. First they began to explore heretofore taboo subject matter - you know, adult topics, which for our protection we adults were not allowed to discuss before the rise of the New Hollywood - then began to experiment with new cinematic conventions: different camera angles (outside of the gimmicky novelty techniques of a Hitchcock or Welles), blocking techniques, stuff that made film more fluid and realistic.

For about a decade we were treated to some of the greatest and most intelligent films the American cinema has ever produced. The Godfather. Dog Day Afternoon. Network. Being There. Raging Bull. And of course, Taxi Driver, that masterpiece of American cinematic art. Films which challenged assumptions, which made one think, which were well directed, technically superb, well acted, and fun to watch.

And then came Spielberg and Jaws.

I hate Spielberg and Lucas. They ruined film. They turned Hollywood on to the blockbuster mentality. They made its raison d'etre the pursuit of the next mindless, special effects heavy spectacle which could then be transformed into a commodity, packaged, merchandised, and turned into a franchise. A good number of the biggest films of the past twenty-five years have been part of franchises, or have spawned sequels. Jurassic Park, Indiana Jones, Alien, Shrek, Spiderman, Batman, Superman - oh, hell, every goddamn superhero film - Jaws, Men in Black - all are franchises.

It's no longer cinema, it's a tool for merchandising.

This reflects the growing shallowness of the American people. In 1976 we could see Travis Bickle and understand that he was a deeply troubled (if interesting to watch) person, yet he had his right to his person and his life, no matter how squalid or depressing - or different. Today we would never tolerate his "antisocial" behavior - we would just ship his ass to Gitmo, and medicate him into a stupor.

Or maybe we would waterboard him until he proclaimed his love for his Dear Leader Bush.

In any case...

The sheeple want standardized shlock where the explosions only kill the bad guys, the stunts look cool but would be fatal if attempted in real life, the hero is a one dimensional cardboard character who always gets the girl in the end. Everything comes from a computer now, is digitally generated - nothing up there on the screen is actually authentic anymore. They want escapist crap that will make them forget for a spell their declining economic position and the fact that this country is fast going to hell in a handbasket.

In real life it ain't that simple. The good folks sometimes suffer horrible fates; the bad folks often die old and in their sleep, content and without a shred remorse for the incredible suffering which they perpetrated on millions. (Bet Bush and Cheney sleep well at night.) Sometimes in trying to save the pretty girl, something goes horribly wrong and she dies a terrible, painful death.

When I see that kind of reality reflected on screen, I might venture back to the cineplex. But for now I continue my boycott against stupidity.

Malarkey in film

I am almost done writing. Whew, that was something.

We are soon to be subjected to the latest Indiana Jones sequel, which is being sprung on an unsuspecting public, 19 years after the last film was released. So what's my beef with that? Plenty.

First off I have to say that Harrison Ford is a little long in the tooth to be playing an action hero (he is 65 as of 2008). Secondly I don't see the point of reviving a long dead cinematic franchise except as a brazen attempt to make money. Thirdly, while homages to 1930s action films are kind of cool, somehow I don't think Spielberg has the same kind of creative tenor that he possessed in the 1980s; I get the feeling that this film will turn out to be a disappointing dud.

What is from the eighties should stay dead and buried, in the eighties.

The only positive that I can see from this sequel is that the character of Marion Ravenwood is supposed to be returning. I always wondered what happened to Karen Allen. She was an attractive and appealing leading lady who would have been an excellent screwball comedy actress had she been making films in the thirties instead of the late seventies/early eighties. 'Tis a shame she hasn't been heard from in years.

Besides, what's an Indiana Jones film without Nazis? The villains were the coolest part of the original films.

The temptation to see this film, like the rest of the sheeple will go ahead and do, will be very great...will...have...to...resist...must...not...risk...disappointment.

Best of TPiR!!

So I finally up and did it. Yesterday came rain so I hopped over to Best Buy and purchased the brand spanking new "Best of The Price is Right" box set.

Thirty dollars well spent.

For myself who is used to watching snippets of programs off YouToob with its pathetic picture quality, this was absolutely incredible. The image quality of these old TPiR episodes is miraculous - almost as if they were recorded yesterday. This was a truly amazing representation of 1970s television. And the interstitials have been preserved also - every element of the episode was there.

I wonder if TV picture tubes back then could pick up that level of detail. Here I am watching on a digital television screen, so it's hard to say.

Let me take this time again to note that it is a miracle in itself that these old episodes were not wiped. This practice was all too common then - videotape was expensive, so TV production companies were constantly reusing them, thus erasing older material. Kudos to the foresight exhibited by Goodson-Todman in preserving all 6800 or so TPiR episodes from the beginning, so future generations can watch and be entertained by them.

Another thing I must note is the whole aspect of the game play. Today I suspect most people come to be a contestant on TPiR to be part of a legacy and all that - it's not about the prizes anymore, but the experience, playing the silly games, etc. Back then, people were seriously happy that they had won something. The prizes meant a great deal. These folks probably didn't have a lot, and the winnings truly were "a fortune in fabulous prizes" to them (thank you for that immortal line, Johnny O). This is quite obvious when you watch these old episodes. I couldn't help but cheer for a lot of those folks. You wanted them to win.

Not so much with players today. They mostly seem to have their hearts set on winning a Viper or $25,000 playing Plinko! Everything else, blah to them. They likely already own much of the "stuff" (to use Drew's excreable expression for prizes) that TPiR offers - purchased on credit, which they owe to the tune of thousands, like everybody else in today's Amerika.

Did anyone notice how many female contestants there were back then? Seriously, the ratio of female contestants to male contestants (I'm talking about people called to "come on down") was something like 20 to 1. I have a few theories on this:

- Most potential contestants were women - there are a lot of ladies in those early 70s audiences

- The producers thought women would make better contestants for game play purposes - who likes to shop, after all?

- Bob Barker liked the ladies (you didn't know Bob was a playa back then?)

- Attractive young ladies made better contestants for ratings purposes

And the best part of it all - the old music package. Childhood memories. Why don't they use those musical cues anymore??? TPiR was the music. Or at least TPiR was made by its music.

Anyway, a great experience. I haven't watched everything on those DVDs so more may make its way here soon.

Comments on a nihilistic age

I must be getting old.

Is it just me or was the past a simpler time?

Yes there was the threat of nuclear annihilation hanging over us then. But the likelihood of this happening was slim. We had the bomb; they had the bomb; everyone knew using it meant mutual destruction.

Today our death comes by a thousand cuts: economic collapse, climate change, social decay, moral disintegration, fiat money, increased taxation, runaway government spending, incompetent leadership....I could go on and on but that would take all day.

Don't you find that society was cleaner and more wholesome then?

You know, right now I am researching old Price is Right episodes. There is so much one can find on YouTube it's not funny. Another modern technological miracle of the online age, much like this blog.

Something about those early TPiR episodes strikes me. I don't know, call it innocence, chalk it up to the fact that they had absolutely no idea that they had thirty-six years (and counting) of game show legacy ahead of them. It was just a fun show played for prizes, and the contestants genuinely seem excited and happy. For all they knew the program would only last a couple of seasons. Bob Barker famously commented somewhere that he thought the show would never last.

What little he knew.

Those early episodes were simply more fun to watch. I don't know about what others are saying, but watching Bob get old and crotchety, then seeing his replacement Drew, a complete product of the nihilistic age, somehow depresses me.

As society grows ever more nihilistic and negative, it strikes me that somewhere we must reach bottom and grotesque, terrible things must result from it. It is inevitable, really. Somewhere the moral decay must destroy its practitioners completely. Woe when that day comes.

The lost era of our yesterdays

I don't know about you, but I find myself thinking inordinately about the past. Maybe I'm getting old, cuz I seem to be doing this a lot more often nowadays.

I feel older than I actually am. I wonder if reincarnation is real - I feel like I have past lives which I can remember. I seem to remember an awful lot that took place, even at times before I was born. Of course, I am a student of history so that may be part of it.

In many cases a song will do it - bring me back to an era, a time and place that existed long ago. Play "Misty" by Johnny Mathis and I can recall elegant women dressed up to the nines, "Beat the Clock", and radio drama.

Play anything by Curtis Mayfield, or the Stylistics, and the ghetto wasteland of the 1970s arises in my minds' eye. I remember it well.

I am playing "Love's Train" by Con Funk Shun (remember them?) on my computer radio right now. Ahhh, 1983 beckons. "Between the Sheets" by the Isley Brothers does the same thing for me.

I don't listen to much post 1980s music since it annoys me. But then that was the point that life tended to go downhill for me, so it's not an era I care to remember much anyhow.

For those of you who want to glamorize the past, I have this to say: The past ain't that glamorous. Sure, they were simpler times - clear enemies on the foreign front, slightly more cleverness and intelligence in government (only slightly, though), three choices to pick from on TV, and fewer electronic devices to annoy us. But there was even in those yesterdays an extraordinary amount of horror, of wasteland, of loneliness stalking the bleak streets of an unlit city in the evening.

I think there are things to celebrate about the past - certainly what entertained us then had more relevance and substance than the garbage which passes for diversion today. Watching an old episode of "Match Game '73" brings back more tearful joy than any given screening of "Survivor" or "Big Brother."

Whatever happened to our sense of propriety?

More best films of all time (and some bad ones too)

Having just finished semi-watching Legally Blonde 2 on TBS while surfing the web here, I am again reminded of the insipidness of modern filmmakers.

And then there were great filmmakers and great artists, but mostly in the past. One of them has just passed away - Charlton Heston, age 84, kick-ass actor and gun rights supporter.

Coincidentally, I happened to catch Planet of the Apes (the original, not the stupid 2001 remake) on AMC Friday night. If this is not the greatest science fiction film ever made, then it's pretty darn close to the greatest.

Which makes me want to create another list of greatest films, which I missed last time around! --

Planet of the Apes: See above.

The Omen (the original, again - why do so many of these classics have crappy remakes?) and its sequels: These films are cool and funny, especially for lapsed devil worshipers such as myself. Hail Satan!

Random Harvest: This is an incredibly gut wrenching drama starring Ronald Colman and the ever lovely Greer Garson. Will bring you to tears, and you'll love the twist ending.

The Rat Race: Happened to see this one today on TCM; stars Tony Curtis and Debbie Reynolds (who looked positively radiant in this picture, more than usual). A little known 1960 drama about two struggling young folk trying to make a better life for themselves, who fall in love along the way.

Shaft: He's a baaaaad mother-shut your mouth!!

Hey Beavis, you know why they call him Shaft, huh huh huh huh???

Superfly: In a word, this film was very fly. Stick it to the Man!!

Deja Vu: Good to see the hometown looking top ho and spifflin' in a film!! The plot was standard sci-fi schlock, but what I liked best was that here, finally, was a film set in my city, but not resorting to any stereotypes or other bullshit which Hollywood usually likes to pull when filming there. It was just a story, which just so happened to take place in this certain location.

I recognized virtually every place shown in that film. I have driven the majority of those streets.

That's all I can think of right now.

And now a list of truly horrible films:

Any action/adventure/superhero film from the past twenty years: The original Die Hard and Batman films were groundbreaking for the time. When Hollywood sees a profit opportunity, they milk it hard, for all it's worth. And boy, have they pumped this well dry, really dry. I am so tired of franchise films it hurts.

King Kong (the 1976 version): Jessica Lange's acting was execrable, and the other actors weren't much better. The idea of capturing a big gorilla to sell more petrol is extremely banal, to say the least. (Truly, this hurt me. People had to die so that the American motorist could be convinced to buy more of a certain brand of petrol, which is an unchanging commodity like salt? Sick. And cloaking the ape in a then-modern petrol pump was just painful to watch.) And from the looks of it Dino de Laurentiis must have thought he was making the greatest love story of all time here.

And was I the only person to catch the obvious racist allegory going on here????!?? Not to mention that planes and the World Trade Center should not mix in media, ever. (To be fair, this was 1976, not 2006. And John Barry's score was actually quite good.)

The Sound of Music: ...makes me wanna scream.

At Long Last Love: Whoever got the idea of making a lighthearted, cheery 30's musical at the height of the nihilistic, hedonistic 70's, with Burt Reynolds and Cybill Shepherd as leads, should have his head examined. (That means you, Peter Bogdanovich. Shame on you for casting your mistress instead of an actress who could have handled the role.)

Not that Cybill can't act; if she's properly coached her performances are fine. Refer to Taxi Driver or first season episodes of Moonlighting. She just can't sing. At all.

Dark Victory: Yeah, I know this is a classic, Bette Davis is a legend, yada, yada. But after viewing it again this weekend, I have concluded that like many 1940s films, it is stagy, hackneyed plotwise, and acted unnaturally with stilted dialogue. (No real fault of the actors, actually; this was seemingly part of film convention of the period.) Plus the camera just sits there; it doesn't move around at all. It's a visual medium, people!!

This is what Hitchcock claimed to hate: pictures of people talking.

And Bette Davis was far, far uglier in real life. (See Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?, when she was too old to care about her appearance anymore, for the proof.) Chalk her radiant appearance in this film to heavy makeup, good studio clothiers, camera tricks, and baling wire (to make her figure appear feminine).

Any film starring a rapper/drip-hop 'artist': Rappers can't act. They can't do much of anything except grunt, scratch their azzes, and make babies out of wedlock.

Any remake of a classic film: What possesses the so-called creative class to do this, I have no idea. Do they hold some presumption that they can improve on the original?? Or are they just dumbasses?

Very, very few remakes of a well-known film improve on the original in any significant way. Tell that to the producers of the Ocean's Eleven remake/inevitable franchise left in its wake.

The Day After Tomorrow: Was this supposed to be Hollywood's answer to An Inconvenient Truth? This film was liberal, statist bullshit from beginning to end. The score was the only thing I liked about it.

Actually, come to think about it, the only disaster film that I have ever really enjoyed was The Towering Inferno, due to its good choice of casting more than anything. (And also Titanic, cuz Kate Winslet posed nude. Just kidding; I hated that film too.)

More to come when I feel inspired.

LCD TV

Weekend television nowadays is filled with the most ridiculous content. Between multiple back to back screenings of The Godfather and The Godfather Part II on AMC this weekend (both fine films, but a bit slow and plodding, really best appreciated if you are obsessed with the Mafia film subgenre) I decided to indulge in my guilty pleasure - SciFi Channel weekend movies:




What can I say about these pathetic attempts at cinematic greatness that hasn’t already been said by a thousand film critics, professional or otherwise? Most of these films fall below even standard B movie schlock. The acting sucks and the ‘special effects’ are worse. And don’t get me started on the ridiculousness of the plots, or what passes for them. The worst part is seeing halfway decent actors like John Rhys-Davies (he seems to appear in a lot of these films – is he that desperate for work?) and the psychiatrist lady from The Bold and the Beautiful reduced to prostituting themselves out for the entire world to see.

I hate to admit this, but these movies snag me every time. The producers of this dreck know that it isn’t fine production values, good acting, or a coherent and believable plot that brings in the customers. They understand what it’s really all about: watching half-dressed and well-endowed nubile young women prancing around in the jungle in wet tank tops!


As much as I enjoy partaking in the visual delights of the full-figured female form, there is a clear and obvious line between respectful homage and sexploitation, and it’s been well breached here.

There’s a sucker born every minute, and the fact that these films continue to be produced and aired on television proves it. Well, give credit to the SciFi film producers for discovering the winning formula for hooking an audience today: LCD, as in Lowest Common Denominator.

Urban Prairie Schooner's Greatest Films of All Time

(Gotta bip up the site hits somehow.)

You may know by now, if you are a regular purveyor of this blog, that I can be rather critical of modern society, and especially popular culture. Since all my regular readers (all four of you) are just dying to know what works of modern cinematic art Urban Prairie Schooner actually considers to be worthy of his adulation, let's shimmy on down the rundown....

The official list of Urban Prairie-certified-safe-for-your-sensibilities films, in no particular order:

The Shawshank Redemption: Good acting, excellent mood, great story about man's struggle against the absolute corruption and tyranny of the State (notwithstanding Tim Robbins' personal political viewpoints).

The Remains of the Day: This film nearly made me cry. Seriously, it's painful, but in a satisfying way. Anthony Hopkins literally becomes his character. Well worth watching!

Raging Bull: Scorsese's second best film (his best film comes later). A triumph of art film technique and Method acting.

Scarface: "Say hello to my lil' frien'!!" This film just rocks. Also captures the look and feel of an era in the not so distant past, that has already vanished before our eyes.

Goodbye, Mr. Chips: As you can see, I have a soft spot for sentimental films which focus on lonely older men who find love late in life. This would be the 1939 version starring Robert Donat and the always lovely Greer Garson.

Network: Prophesy. That's all I'm gonna say. A kickass film to boot, too.

Dr. Strangelove: My favorite comedy of all time. "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here, this is the War Room!" Did you know that this film is actually a documentary? This is actually what goes down in the halls of Defense in times of crisis.

The Ghost and Mrs. Muir: I have always liked this film for some reason, likely having something to do with its musical score (composed by the great Bernard Hermann) or its star, the beautiful Gene Tierney. And yeah, Rex Harrison as the ghost is an older man who finds love very late in life...

Vertigo: Yeah, yeah, I know, the plot is unrealistic and convoluted. But San Francisco has never looked better on film, and music has never sounded better on film either (courtesy of the great Hermann again).

Marty: Yet another loner who finds love. A good film even if it plays to stereotypes a little too much.

A Face in the Crowd: An excellent story about how the media can manipulate and corrupt absolutely. If the only place you've seen Andy Griffith is on the Andy Griffith Show or Matlock, then this will set you up for a shock. Also starring Patricia Neal and Walter Matthau as the conscience character. Semi-based on the rise and fall of 1950s TV icon Arthur Godfrey.

The Aviator: This was a decent effort by Scorsese to make a biopic about the twisted and convoluted life of the legendary Howard Hughes. As a bonus, the film contains an underlying theme of individualism and standing up to the idiocracy of the State. (Regrettably, the truth in real life, as always, was somewhat different.)

Ocean's Eleven: The 1960 original - no crappy big budget remakes in this list. Wonderfully captures the sleaze and glamour of Rat Pack era Las Vegas.

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World: An incredible and stupendous array of stunts, one liners, and car chases packed into four hours of laugh out loud mayhem. This was Stanley Kramer's answer to those who said he couldn't do comedy.

Beavis and Butt-head Do America: YES!!! "Whoa, Butt-head, we're on the Urban Prairie Blog...." "You said log, huh huh huh." Gave us classic lines such as, "It's coming from the ass, but it's also coming from the ass of the ass." (I have very lowbrow tastes, I know.)

The Blues Brothers: The greatest musical of all time. Car chases, great music, dead malls, Chicago....this has it all.

North by Northwest: A rollicking good suspense/comedy from Hitchcock. Favorite line: "Your next role will be when you play dead. You'll be quite convincing, I assure you."

Forrest Gump: This film always makes me cry, for some reason. Otherwise it is sap and Hollywood cheese 100% of the way. But something about it always seems to get to me.

A Beautiful Mind: Also another film that makes me cry. Individuals struggling against great adversity strikes a chord with me. Of course with this film you get the sanitized for public consumption Hollywood version of John Nash's life; the reality was a tad bit different.

And now the list of Urban Prairie's finest:

Taxi Driver: My favorite film, hands down. Living in the 'hood does something to a person. It makes one cynical and bitter. Living on one's own in the 'hood for a long period of time exaberates that process. In any case, Scorsese spoke to me on this one. I understand where Travis is coming from, because I think sometimes, when we're down, we all feel like he does. We all want to wash the scum off the streets at times. Granted most of us are not psychotic loners, but don't we all experience alienation of this sort at times? (I guess not if you're rich, white, and twenty-one, or if you're female, blonde, and have a rich daddy, but not all of us in this world have the good fortune to be so 'blessed'.)

This film would be merely great without Bernard Hermann's excellent and dark musical score, the last he completed before his death. The music makes all the difference - it makes this film legendary.

Citizen Kane: Enough has been written about this film and its greatness. So I will add nothing here other than to say it lives up to its reputation.

Casablanca: Yeah, I like it too.

If The Magnificent Ambersons had been cut according to Orson Welles' vision, it might be here also. But let's just say that RKO loused that one up real good.

I have ideas for films that would be even greater than these. But since I don't have a spare $100 million lying around and I'm not related to anyone in the film industry, these will remain just that - ideas. Maybe I'll get around to sharing them here sometime....

Julie was her name

You know who really was a dish? Miss Julie London:

(Va voom!)

This link goes to her official fan site, where there is a chunk more information and many more pictures.

Sadly, the beautiful and talented Miss London, famous actress and singer of stage and screen both big and small (best known for the role of Nurse Dixie McCall from Emergency!) passed on some years ago, and no longer graces us with her lovely presence.

I first encountered Miss London when I happened across the film Man of the West some time ago on TCM, in which she plays the female lead. They just don't make lady actresses like that anymore, complete with the dignity and grace of true femininity that has been tragically lost to our so-called 'enlightened' era.

See, this is why I can't understand why people are so obsessed with Angelina, Britney, and their ilk. They are, for lack of a better term, stupid spoiled classless whores when compared to the celebrities of the past. We knew better once....